Ivan Drago vs. Soda Popinski
Ivan Drago vs. Soda Popinski is a What-If Death Battle created by Venage237. This fan made Death Battle features Ivan Drago from Rocky IV, and Soda Popinski from the Punch-Out series. Description Rocky vs. Punch-Out. Today, two Russian boxers that illegally enhance their strength by giving them steroids, are going to battle each other to see who is the superior boxer. Will The Killer of Apollo Creed, outmatch Vodka Drunkenski? Interlude Boomstick: A long-ass time ago, some Greek guy punched another guy, and the eventually the two turned into a sport. This is the art of Boxing. Wiz: But when it comes to winning, there are a select handful of people who'll do anything they can to acquire victory. Which includes cheating. And some will even use some kind of physical enhancer to make their punches stronger. Boomstick: AKA steroids. And these two Russian Boxers are the prime example, of Streroid-Enhanced Boxers. Wiz: Ivan Drago, the Boxer who killed Apollo Creed. Boomstick: And Soda Popinski, AKA Vodka Drunkenski. He's Wiz, and I'm Boomstick. Wiz: And it's out job to analyze their weapons, armor, and skills to find you'll win a Death Battle. Ivan Drago Boomstick: Standing 6ft 5in, weighing 268 pounds, Ivan Drago is a literal monster of Russia in human form. Wiz: And he's not kidding. Born during the Cold Wars, Ivan Drago was partially a representer of Russia, as he was both a Olympic gold medalist, and an amateur boxing champion from the Soviet Union. Boomstick: But during his time in the major leagues, the Soviet Union decided to cheat of all things. They decided to inject Ivan with a steroid that made his punches like getting hit by a truck. Wiz: But because steroids were illegal to give to professional boxers, Ivan, or rather the people who represent Drago, since Ivan Drago's a man of few words, told interviewers that he worked out a lot, and ate his greens. Boomstick: Being a professional boxer, naturally, Ivan Drago is an expert on boxing. He heavily focuses on brute strength, and overpowering his opponent, and giving them very little time to recover. Which makes him very similar to that of a Slugger. Wiz: Plus, he's also surprisingly mobile for a man of his size. Sure he's not flipping around, but he is capable of maneuvering, and avoiding punches from quick moving boxers like Apollo Creed. And speaking of his brute strength, that leads to his greatest attribute; his punches. Boomstick: Yeah, well remember when we said that Ivan's punches are like getting hit by a truck? Well, according to certain Soviet scientists, as well as one of those devices to determine the strength of a single punch, Ivan Drago is capable of delivering a punch over 2,000 psi. Wiz: Which, I should mention that one of Drago's punches is actually more powerful than the discharge of a shotgun at close range, as well as being more powerful than Frank Bruno's strongest punch, which stands at 1,420 pounds. Boomstick: With that monstrous strength, Ivan was even able to kill a man while at the ring. Which kinda makes him like a Russian Balrog, even though Balrog was banned from the entering ring while Drago is still able to continue boxing. Wiz: And because Ivan killed one Rocky Balboa's friend, our favorite Italian Stallion challenged Drago to a boxing match... only instead of fighting in America, the two would have their wrestling match in Russian territory. Boomstick: So the two trained in Russia for the big boxing match. So while Rocky was training in the mountains, Drago trained with standard exercise equipment.... and steroids. And it arguably one of the toughest boxing matches, Rocky had in his life. I mean, Ivan killed a man in the boxing ring, with his bare hands. Wiz: Not to mention, both Ivan and Rocky were sparring in a 15 Round Boxing Match..... With Rocky just barely emerging victorious. Boomstick: But despite him losing to the Italian Stallion, Ivan has been shown to be a force to be recon with in the ring. During his time as an amateur boxer, Drago's managed to acquire a 31 and 0 record, and 14 victories as a pro boxer. Meaning he's acquired 45 victories in his boxing career alone. Not to mention the aforementioned of the powers of his punches, and the fact that his punches are more than capable of killing a man. Seriously, this guy seems nearly unstoppable. Wiz: Well, that is, until he lost to Rocky. With his lost, Ivan perfect record was forever lost. And because of that one lost, Ivan was unable to resume his boxing career. I'm guessing that the Soviets expected perfection towards their fellow boxers. Boomstick: But should Ivan Drago were ever to return in the boxing ring.... may you pray that you survive his brutal onslaught. Ivan: I must break you.... Soda Popinski Cue Soda Popinski's theme Wiz: The WVBA is filled with a bunch of colorful boxers, hailing from different regions, and often being a being controversial due to them being stereotypes of various nations. Boomstick: From a cowardly French man, an overweight Canadian, and even a stereotypical celebrity. But arguable, none of them come close to debatably the most controverstial of all of them; The Russian Boxer, Vodka Drunkenski. Wiz: Or as he's calls himself; Soda Popinski. Soda Popinski drinks a bottle of soda in the ring, crushes the bottle with his head and laughs out loud. Boomstick: All of a sudden I'd like a nice cold one. Wiz: Hailing somewhere in Soviet Russia, Soda Popinski is the 3rd ranked member of the World Circuit of the WVBA. But sometime before giving himself the name Soda Popinski, he was originally known as "Vodka Drunkenski," due to his habit of drinking a bottle of Vodka during an intermission. Boomstick: But because it his name was most likely unintentionally racist towards his own country, which made no better that Vodka was made in Russia, and the fact that he was boxing at around the time the Cold Wars were still going, it didn't take long for him to both change his drinking habits, and his name. Wiz: So he eventually quit drinking vodka, and traded in by drinking soda. And because of that Vodka changed his Boxing name from Vodka to Soda Popinski. Boomstick: Being a professional boxer, Soda is an absolute tank, when it comes to physical strength, and power. And when it comes to how he fight, Soda is surprisingly versatile, as his stance varies. Wiz: What is clear though is that Soda heavily relies on attack with side jabs, and powerful uppercut. Boomstick: And they hit hard and fast! Capable of dealing chucks on damage towards his opponent. But that's not even the half of what Soda's capable of doing in a boxing match. Hell, he's capable of pulling a bottle of soda out of his ass-- And serious where else is he pulling that bottle out of, and takes a sip Wiz: With one sip from his soda, Popinski is capable of increasing his stamina, and keep on fight. In fact on drop from his soda, is more than enough to have him jump right back, and deliver his signature move; The Soda Rush. Which is basically Soda unleashing 3 to 6 fast-moving uppercuts in succession. Boomstick: Hell, he'll even do that if someone punches the soda out of his hand. However, Sodas aren't the only type of drinks Popinski will have at his disposal. Wiz: That's correct. After his defeat by the hands of Little Mac, Soda Popinski actually became the test subject for Soviet scientist to test out a new elixir. This Elixir greatly increase his strength and speed, and makes his skin more and more red the more he drinks them. Boomstick: in other word, he's taking some steroids during a boxing match. Wiz: Pretty much. Boomstick: Does the WVBA even care that some of their boxers cheat? Wiz: I guess not, considering the boxer before him, is more than willing to use a weapon in a match in order to win. Boomstick: Can't say I really blame him, since Little Mac is a small but mighty tanks. And speaking of tanks, Soda Popinski is one too. He's managed to participate in over 35 matches during his career, and won 33 of them, with 24 of the were via KOs. Tough enough to endure the harsh cold of the Russian weathers, while traversing towards his private training area wearing nothing but a speedo, and strong enough to pull an armored truck with a chain, using ONLY HIS TEETH! Wiz: That being said, Soda's record isn't perfect. Not including his matches with Little Mac, Soda Popinski has lost two times, with one of his loses was thanks to Mr. Sandman. And despite him no longer having a drinking problem toward alcohol, he still has one towards Soda. Hell, if anyone punches a bottle of Soda out of his hand, then he'll temporarily go on a frenzy. Boomstick: All the more reason not to take his sodas." Soda Popinski is in the ring, and takes a drink of soda before the next round. Death Battle (The scene begins in a Boxing Ring in Russia. The crowd is ecstatic as the match is about to begin.) Announcer: Ladies, and Gentlemen, presenting you a match of the century, as two boxer hailing in the very Russian territory we're standing on. Whomever wins will be the representer of Russia, while the loser.... well.... better luck next time. The Crowd begins to cheer loudly. As this is going on the Russian National Anthem is being played." Announcer: In the Red Corner, standing 6'5", weighing in at 268lbs, this man says little to no words, as he only needs his fists to do the talking. HEEEEEE'S IVAN, DRAGO!!!! Ivan Drago, along with his Cornermen walk in and enter the ring. Just then, Soda Popinkski's theme begins to play. Announcer: And in the other Red Corner, standing 6'6", weighing in at 237lbs, he's once had an addiction with alcohol, but know has an addiction towards soda. The former Vodka Drunkenski; SODA POPINSKI!! Soda Popinski walks in with his Cornermen, and a few cases of sodas. Announcer: Wha- What a minute! Why is Soda Popinski bringing bottles of soda into the ring? Is that even legal? The announcer looks in the instruction manual, as Soda Popinski walks in with the boxing ring. Announcer: Okay, I've just read the instructions, and there in nothing about bringing a any form of beverage into a match.... So... It's legal! The cornermen prepare their respected boxers, while Soda Popinski takes a quick sip of soda. The Two boxers make their way into the center. Referee: Alright, I want nothing dirty in this match. That means, no hits below the belt. Understand? The two stare at each other contently. Ivan: I must break you. Soda: I'm Soda Popinski! I will crush you! The two slam their gloves together, and backed a few inches. Announcer: Alright everyone! Is everyone ready?! And...... Ivan and Soda make their way towards each other... The Bell rings. Announcer: FIGHT! Fight Both boxers deliver a punch, at the same time, hitting each other's fists. Ivan processes to deliver a jab to the left, attempting to hit Soda's side. Soda managed to duck under the punch and proceeded with an uppercut. Ivan managed to block the uppercut, but was pushed back in the process. In response, Soda proceeded to attack Drago's side, with a side jab. Ivan managed to block it, and countered with a few jabs to soda's face. The jabs were successful, but Soda was unfazed. Ivan then proceeded to deliver stronger punches to the face. Soda managed to block them, and countered with an uppercut. The Uppercut was successful, and Ivan staggered a bit. In responses, Soda continued his onslaught, in an attempt to drive Drago to the corner of the ring. With a few jabs, and an uppercut, Soda managed to do so. But as he was about to deliver power punch to Ivan's face, Ivan managed to duck under the punch, and slip under Soda Popinski. Before Soda can even do anything however, Ivan proceeded to deliver several punches to Ivan's face. With a good punch Soda was sent staggering on his knees. Before he can get back up however, Ivan stepped up, and delivered a punch on the side of Soda's head, knocking out. With Soda down, the referee told Ivan to get back to his of his ring. Referee: One! The crowd watches intently. Referee: Two! Ivan watches a downed Soda. Referee: Three! Just then Soda pulls out a bottle of soda. Referee: Four! A drop of soda drops into Soda's mouth, causing him to instantly jump back up. Referee: Fight! Before Ivan could continue with his onslaught however, Soda Popinski performed the Soda Rush, as delivered three strong uppercut towards Ivan. Ivan was unable to block them, and was knocked down. The Referee came to perform a countdown. While that's going on, Soda began to laugh out loud. Referee: One! Two! Three! Four! Ivan managed to get back up. Referee: Alright, fight! But before the two could continue the match, the bell had rung, which resulted in the end of the first round. The two boxers returned to their side of the ring. As the cornermen were mending the wound on their respected boxers, both Ivan and Soda stare at each other. Ivan's Cornerman: It's alright Ivan. You've got this one. Soda Popinski has nothing on you. Ivan: Does anyone ever? Soda: Looks like you need a drink, Ivan Drago! Moment later the second round is about to begin. Ivan makes his way towards the center of the ring. But before Soda does the same, he takes a quick drink of soda for luck. As the two make it to the center of the ring, he bell had rung, starting the second round. Round 2 Without hesitating, Ivan quickly performed several jabs towards Soda's face. Soda managed to block them, and retaliate with a jab towards Ivan's side. Ivan managed to duck under the jab, and continued with a few jabs with Soda's stomach. The first hit was successful, but Soda backed up before Ivan could continue his assault. He then proceeded to deliver a powerful uppercut with his right arm. Ivan managed to dodge it by rolling to the side towards the left side of Soda. In response however, Soda used the momentum to delivered a powerful jab towards Ivan, using his left arm. The hit was successful, and Ivan staggered. Despite this, Ivan quickly recovered, and strafed towards Soda. He then proceeded to attack violently toward him. During this, Soda managed to block them, and pushed him back. Ivan began to grow more annoyed with Soda, with Soda was beginning to get more confident against Ivan. During which, Soda pulled out a bottle of Soda out from his person. Soda: For my health! Before he could take a drink however, Ivan, while attempt to punch Soda Popinski, accidently punched the bottle out of his hand. Soda: My bottle! Enraged, Soda Popinski proceeded to deliver another Soda Rush at Ivan. Ivan attempted fight back, as Soda unleashed four uppercuts in a row.... only for Ivan to be overpowered by Soda's attack. This time however, it didn't knock him out. After Soda finished his assault, Ivan continued his assault on Soda. He violent attacked him with multiple jabs and strikes towards Soda's face. Soda attempts to block and counter, but was unsuccessful. Eventually, Ivan delivered an uppercut, towards Soda's chin, resulting in Popinski getting knocked out on the ring. The referee comes out and proceeds to perform a countdown. Referee: One! Two! Three! Four! Five! Six!.... Soda pulls out a bottle of soda and takes a sip. Referee: Seven! With a drop from the bottle, Soda Popinski got back up, and proceeded to perform another Soda Rush on Ivan. This time however, Ivan managed to dodge the uppercuts, and Soda looks with shock of the aftermath. Tired and exhausted, the two boxer stare at each other. As the two were about to deliver a punch towards each other, the bell had rung, ending the second round. But before they could stop, both boxers managed to punch each other's fist hard. The two returned to their respected corners. Announcer: And that's the end of round 2. Both Boxers look like they've been through hell. But with only one more round to go, who know which one will emerge victorious. Ivan sits down, while his cornermen attend to his wounds. Soda on the other hand beginning to get desperate, and does something. Ivan watches as Soda is doing something. Ivan's Cornerman: You got this Ivan. Just keep up with the assault, and you'll beat this chump in no time. Ivan continues watching as he witness Soda Popinski drinking a bottle of soda. Much like the beginning of the second round. Ivan walks towards the center of the ring, while Soda takes another quick sip of soda, only this time, he's drinking from two bottles at the same time. The two make it to the center, and the bell rings, beginning the third and final round. Round 3 As soon as the bell rung, Soda managed to move faster than normal, and deliver a powerful punch at Ivan's face. Before he could dodge, Ivan gets hit, and is sent to the ground. The Referee comes in. Referee: One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine... As soon as the referee reaches nine, Ivan managed to get back on his feet, and continues the fight. He then proceeded to deliver several punches towards Soda, only to be block by Soda. Soda then retaliates by performing several fast-moving side jabs. Two from the right, and one from the left. Following the left side jab, Soda then proceeded to deliver an uppercut. The uppercut managed to hit Ivan, causing him to be pushed back. Despite this, Ivan manages to quickly regain his footing, and responses with a forward punch. The punch managed to hit Soda' chest, but Soda was unaffected. With a quick laugh, Soda processed to deliver another uppercut, following with a series of punches one by one. Tired, and exhausted, Ivan was unable to block the blows. As the punches kept going, blood began to spew out of Ivan. Cuts, and bruises appeared all over Ivan's face and chest. One by one, Soda kept on delivering more and more punches, as Ivan finds himself at the corner of the ring. Eventually Soda stopped delivering the punches. With a couple of seconds to himself, Ivan ended up spitting blood. Unable to see, due to blood in his eyes. Unable to block, due to exhaustion. Unable to move, Ivan just stood there. Eventually, Soda delivered a powerful uppercut. The uppercut managed to hit Ivan just below the jaw. The hit broke Ivan's neck, and his body limbed down to the ground. The referee comes in. Referee: One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine TEN! Knock out! The bell rings, and the crowd cheers wildly. Announcer: AND THAT WAS A BRUTAL MATCH! THE WINNER BY KNOCK OUT IS SODA.... POPINSKI!!!! Soda dancing with cheer, as he's juggling a few bottles of soda. Announcer: Now can someone get the medic? I think Ivan needs some medical attention. The Medic come in and checks his body. Medic: No pulse. No breathing.... Neck is completely broken.... Ivan's dead! KO * A Tarp covers Ivan's body * Soda takes a quick drink of soda as the Russian flag is seen behind him. Conclusion Cue Soda Popinski's theme Boomstick: I guess it is true. In Soviet Russia, Boxers break you. Wiz: This was an extremely close match. Both of these Russian boxers were even on multiple criterias. While Ivan was slightly stronger as his punches were the strength of a shotgun at close range, Soda Popinski on the other hand was surprisingly more durable. Boomstick: Considering that he's tanked blows with other heavy hitters before, which also includes a man who can destroy an entire brick building with only a few punches, Soda Popinski is no stranger to tanking heavy blows. Ivan's punches on the other hand, while are surprisingly stronger than most, his powers don't come as close as someone like Mr. Sandman's punches. Wiz: By doing a quick comparison, Ivan's punches have the strength of a shotgun at close range. However, the equivalent of a shotgun hitting a brick wall, leaves only shattered shots to said wall. And for the most part, the shotgun fire doesn't always go through the brick wall. And because Soda survive hits from someone who's capable of punching through a brick wall, this ultimate means, that Soda wins in the durability factor. Boomstick: And we both know what you're asking; What about the enhancement? Surely Ivan has this one, right? Well surprisingly no. The thing is that, Ivan has ordinary steroids. While it is true that Steroids do increase the muscle mass, and strength of a person's strength, it's only temporary. Plus there's the fact that Ivan could only use the steroids that he already had inject to them. And because steroids do wear out after sometime, this ultimately means that time is not on Ivan's side. Soda Popinski on the other hand, has a special form of steroids he's more than capable of using at anytime he can get his hands on both during a match, and during an intermission; Soda. Wiz: Or the Elixirs would have a similar, if not better results. And because Soda is capable of regaining his stamina during a fight, by simply drinking a soda, this ultimately means that Soda Popinski was more than capable of continue on a fight.... that is , until he runs out that is. But still, Popinski can at least restore his stamina and increase his striking power within the battle, while Drago can't. And let's not forget that when it comes to the combatants they fought before, Ivan has only confronted ordinary boxers, with no signs of superhuman attributes, or any forms of steroid enhancements. Soda Popinski on the other hand, has managed to fought, and outmatch other boxers with inhuman strength, a boxer capable of running faster than a bullet train, which I should mention the fastest bullet train on record is approximately 357.2 mph, and even a boxer with mystical genie powers. This ultimately means that Soda Popinski more adaptive in the boxing arena, and therefore the superior boxer in multiple aspects. Boomstick: And because of this Ivan's chances of winning simply fizzed out. Wiz: The Winner is Soda Popinski. Next Time A game of Cards and Dice, taken to the next level.. Who will be rooting for? Ivan Drago Soda Popinski Who do you want to win? Ivan Drago Soda Popinski Who's your favorite Russian Boxer? Ivan Drago Soda Popinski Did you agree with the outcome of Ivan Drago vs. Soda Popinski? Yes No Maybe Category:What-If? Death Battles Category:'Anti-Hero vs. Villain' Themed Death Battles Category:'Video Games vs Movies' themed Death Battles Category:Boxing Match Death Battle Category:'Rocky vs. Punch Out!!!' Themed Death Battles Category:Fistfight Category:Human vs Human themed DEATH BATTLEs Category:"Male vs Male" Themed Death Battles Category:Completed What-If? Death Battles Category:What-If? Death Battles completed in 2017 Category:'Strength' themed Death Battle Category:Death Battles by 2 Different Series Category:Death Battles by 2 Different Companies